The TEFCAS Success Formula

Have you failed many times in life? Do you know that failure can actually be a very good thing? Failure is actually an integral part of learning and growth. In fact, I like the saying in NLP that ‘there’s no such thing as failure, only feedback’.

no such thing as failure

Failure = Feedback

I first came across the TEFCAS Success Formula from one of Tony Buzan’s mind-mapping books. Once you understand the TEFCAS formula, you’ll realize that it’s actually our natural way of learning and getting better in whatever areas that we want to master. Many things that we’ve learned in life were mastered through failures, we weren’t born with those skills eg. riding a bike, playing sports, even walking.

[Read more…]

Boost Your Confidence by Asking Empowering Questions

We all have ample of self-confidence within at all times, but we may not feel it all the time. Surely you can think of instances in the past when you had personal power and felt immensely confident. The key is to be able to summon the necessary confidence whenever you want it.

Whenever you’re hesitant ask yourself this, “What is stopping me from having or doing what I want?” This question will shift your frame of mind, internal dialogue and change your internal state into a more confident state.

 

Are you asking Empowering Questions?

 

[Read more…]

How to Develop Magical Confidence – Secrets of a Magician (Maxim #5)

Finally, the last Maxim on ‘How to Develop Magical Confidence – Secrets of a Magician’. Hope it has been a useful series for my readers. Feed your mind with the final idea.

 

Maxim 5 – Be Prepared

There are always people in your life that you need to impress: your bosses, colleagues, clients, prospects, friends, family members, even strangers. The question is this: At what price would you pay to really make an impression on them? To what end would you go to make your “performances” work to win your audience?

The best magicians would go to whatever extreme end to win their audience over.  Advance preparation is the key. Sometimes the preparation takes place within the first couple of minutes of their tricks while they were casually chatting to their audience. The audience thinks they are just warming up, but in actual fact, the magicians are performing the most crucial parts of the show during that key couple of minutes. It’s called misdirection. Also, many times, preparation can take days, months or even years of careful planning. Magician Michael Webber said that you should be so far in advance ahead of the game that the audience doesn’t know that a game is being played!

In Maxim #4, I wrote about Practicing Your Outs, which is also a type of advance preparation. And there are more.

 

[Read more…]

Knowing What You Want Gives Clarity and Purpose

Let’s revisit the first question in yesterday’s post “What do you want?” again.

Recently, I sat in a planning meeting with a group of young committees of a local organization. In the middle of an agenda, the leader stated adamantly who he doesn’t want to work with and what he doesn’t want to experience again because of a past fallout. But when asked what is it that he really wants for this team to achieve, he paused silently and thought for a while, and then simply uttered a blank “errrmmm….”.

I wasn’t sure if the leader provided any useful direction to his project team in the first place. It could have helped if he explicitly expressed his intentions and purpose to clarify the main objectives and the desired outcomes.

It’s like providing a road map without knowing where to go; the leader was telling his team where not to go and what not to do, but didn’t state the destination and how to get there! Did he know his desired destination in the first place? I really couldn’t tell! He was more driven to avoid past pains than to move towards something new. Fine. Maybe he had learned something useful from his past undertakings which had shaped his present approach, but his team doesn’t know the pain and didn’t need to. They didn’t need to know something unknown to move away from, but something to move towards to. Something clear, so they could fix their eyes on the target. Isn’t that more useful?

[Read more…]

2 Fundamental Questions to Answer in Becoming Unstoppable

There really are just 2 questions that we need to answer to have what we want in life:

1) What is it that I want?

2) So, what’s stopping me from having what I want?

If we can truly answer the 2 questions, then, there’s nothing in life that can get in our way to stop us from having what we want.

 

What Do You Want?

Back to the first question, what is it that you truly, really want? Many times when asked that, people would say I want a better job, more money, a raise, a good-looking partner, bigger house and car, a nice vacation to escape from whatever they’re going through etc. If we honestly look deep within, we would not really want these things, but what these things can make us feel.  The feeling of being recognized, of owning bigger things, of feeling important or feeling more secured, comfortable etc.

 

[Read more…]