How to Develop Magical Confidence – Secrets of a Magician (Maxim #3)

Ok, here we are on Day 3 of the series. To read my earlier posts in the series, here’s Maxim #1 and Maxim #2.

 

Maxim Three: Don’t State – Suggest

Magicians do not directly state that they have magical powers, but they skilfully and subtly “suggest” that that’s the case. They’d lead their audience to come to this belief, and form this conclusion in their own mind.

Who will the audience believe more, you or themselves?

People will believe their own opinions and conclusions than yours. When you flat out make a statement, it’s often open up for debate. People may agree with you as much as they may disagree. Instead, if you give a suggestion, people may reason it for themselves and form their own conclusion and judgment based on your suggestion. And that’s more believable to them, because it’s THEIR conclusion, and they arrive there themselves.  Once people feel they’re drawn to their own conclusion, you’ve planted in your intended message without ever stating it outright.

 

How to Use the Power of Suggestion

For this maxim to work, you can use verbal and non-verbal suggestions. In his book, Steve Cohen went into some way into teaching the hows. To give you an idea, consider this statement “Mary was really nervous before the interview.” That’s an outright statement. Instead, I can paint the picture like this: “Mary was pacing back and forth, as her heart was beating hard and pulse racing, felt butterflies in her stomach as she glanced at her notes for one last time before facing the interviewer.” Based on the latter description, I can impress my story and intention upon readers more effectively. It’s based on the old adage “Show, but don’t tell!”

Here’s another useful example. Suppose you’re presenting in a crowd and you want them to accept you as a trustworthy authority and expert on the subject of real estate, which you are. Without stating outright, you can describe your track record with real impressive figures and give testimonials from high-profile clients whom you’ve made happy. Your audience will be led to believe that you’re the man they should pay close attention to, without you laboring to convince them by saying so.

You can also use this in conversations and suggest what you think without imposing your opinions which may come as too strong or offensive. This is useful especially when you come into certain disagreements. For example, instead of saying “I disagree with you”, or “my opinion is better” which will cause the other person to pull the mental handbrake and shut you off immediately, you can use one of these alternatives:

“I hear you. May I suggest another way we can consider…?”

“I’m not sure I’m following your logic, can I suggest an alternative…?”

“That is one way of viewing the issue, and here’s another….”

“That’s interesting. Now, you may also find another angle interesting…”

By doing so, you redirect the flow of the conversation without putting down anyone. You can win over your opponent without much struggle.

You want your audience to join your side not by force, but by themselves being willing and happy followers. You want a tribe of believers behind you.

In a nutshell, it’s more effective and effortless to win your audience by using the softer approach. Use the power of suggestions. Practice it. Make it your habit and part of your mindset. Add this idea into your confidence development toolbox and let me know how effective and useful it turn out for you.

 

Comments

  1. Roberto Pezzetti says:

    Aw, this was a really nice post. In thought I want to put in writing like this moreover – taking time and actual effort to make a very good article… however what can I say… I procrastinate alot and certainly not seem to get one thing done.

  2. Awesome article! I just added it to my favorites.

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